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Fake Online Dating Account

I did this in early August 2004. The story is that I was trying to register with OKcounter, however, the problem is, i have to join some stupid online dating site? Are Koreans perverted or what (They created OKCounter, you idiot) to make us poor Americans join those sites? So, I chose to make a fake online dating account for the hell of it.

Now, do you want to e-mail Mr. Cordell Papranec? Okay, right on! Ask him questions, comments, suggestions, give spam, flames, just give him whatever you want to ask! We'll post his answers here for your enjoyment.

Contact him right here.

Username: omgosamaizlikhotzyum {ID: 47989204}
Birth: December 31, 1905
You are: a man
Looking for: a man
Country: Kazahkastahn
City: Aksakovka

Height: under 4' 6"
Weight: OVER 400 POUNDS
My profile headline is: PH34R MY MAN BOOBS!!!!!!!!!!
My Occupation is : Other
My occupation description is: UNEMPLOYED. I'M LIK SO HOT.
Area I grew up in: liK why??~?! DAMN YOU LIK STALKERS!1111111111! LOL
Zodiac Sign: I don't believe in it
Languages I speak: Yiddish
I am divorced.
My hair color is "radically dyed"
annual income is under 15,000
education level is elementary
my body style is lean/slender
how important appearance is "most important"
religion: Quaker
Eye color: Black/Ebony
Ethnicy: OTHER
Political View: right wing (whatever, the hell that is)
How Important intelligence is: not important
smoking habits: smokes regularly
activity level: never active
children: some live with me
Drinking habits: frequently
want children: YES
Describe myself: LIK, I LIK TO DO COSPLAY, IT'Z LIK SO AWESOMEE!!1111111111! AND LIK, I BELIEVE IN BEATING CHILDREN AND THROWING THEM IN LIK CAGES. IT'S SO OMFG AWESOME!!!!!!1 I LIVE IN LIK A HUT RIGHT BY LIK A NUCLEAR FACTORY. IT'S LIK SO FUCKING AWESOME!!11111! I MOSTLY COSPLAY AS FAYE OR SAILORMOON. I LOVE MY ASS.

my favorite activites: wine tasting
My personality is: flamboyant
About the one I'm looking for: LIK I WANT HER TO BE LIKE, NO WAIT, I WANT HIM TO BE LIK, FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! HELL YEAH...
my favorite cuisines: everything XD
my favorite music: rap/hip hop (ick)
I like to read: comics XD
My idea of the perfect first date: LIK WE MAKE OUT AND SUDDENLY I'M LIK SPIDERMAN AND ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM I FLY LIK OVER THIS BUILDING AND SHE'S LIKE MAKING OUT WITH A WOMAN AND LIK THEY SUDDENLY BECOME LIK TWINZZZZZZZZZZZ AND SUDDENLY, LIK, I LIK...I'M LIK SHIT. AND THEN SUDDENLY, WE'RE LIKE MAKING OUT AGAIN, ONLY WITH HER TWIN.
TWO PEOPLE KISING KICKS MAJOR ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I like going out to: night clubs XD
My favorite physical activites: boating/sailing/rafting
MY PERCEPTION OF AN IDEAL RELATIONSHIP: MY PERCEPTION IS HOT SEX...W00T. WITH TWINZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!

What I've learned from my past relationships: NEVER ZIP UP YOUR PANTS WHERE MR. WANKY IS LIK STILL HANGING OUT...WAIT...BILL STILLER DID THAT LIK...OMFG!!!111111!! I'M LIK SO HALARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!


Now, do you want to e-mail Mr. Cordell Papranec? Okay! Ask him questions, comments, suggestions, give spam, give him whatever you want to ask! Even ask for dates! We'll post his answers here for your enjoyment.

Contact him right here.


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